Recently I managed to offend probably one fourth the population of this country in my discourse on blue-collar art, Velvet Elvises, and rednecks. So, I suppose, while I'm on a roll, maybe I should, to be fair, pick up on the other extreme--"yuppie" art. For my New Zealand friend, let me explain that the term grew out of the late 70s as the "hippie" element in this country died at the hands of affluence, moving from their Volkswagen minibus to the 4-wheel drive Range Rover, from pad to loft, from beer to wine, from weed to coke, from bell-bottoms to Dockers, from sandals to penny loafers, and from "The Valley of the Dolls" to Silicon Valley. The term actually grew from an acronym for Young Urban Professionals. "Yuppies" somehow had a friendlier sound than merely "YUPs".

Yuppies ALWAYS come in couples, though not necessarily married (to each other at least), and not necessarily of the opposite sex. They are always college educated, though not always bearing degrees. (You can tell those that DO because they're always framed and hung prominently in their cubicle.) They have 1.7 children (known as Yuppie puppies) and think nothing of paying more for a year of daycare than they paid for a year of college. They've not been out of debt since they were 18, their favorite food is take-out, their favorite vegetable is raw, and they've been on a diet since they were 18 too. They are invariably Democrats, (Republicans are called "fatcats") they belong to a health club where the play handball (golf only as guests at Republican country clubs). They recycle everything including their wives and children (which they've been known to name after their favorite bottled water). And, they shop only at malls except for those rare occasions when they've been known to sneak into the back door at a Walmart.

In terms of art, they visit galleries often (especially when there's wine and cheese), they confuse Monet and Manet but can tell a Picasso from a Braque at fifty paces. They buy only signed, limited edition prints, profess a great love for Kandinsky, but only hang Leroy Nieman. Their favorite decorating colors are white and off-white (but not TOO off-white) with accents of mauve and spilled Chardonnay. Their knowledge of art history begins and ends with Impressionism and the closest they've ever been to an actual art museum is that time they accidentally surfed into www.moma.org while looking for information on breast feeding. Artists love Yuppies. They have money and good tastes. Both are borrowed, and both expendable if the price is right. If any of this sounds like you, then you MIGHT be a Yuppie.